Zeloo Kata

My sweet baby girl,

Last week, your Daddy and I made the decision to start the adoption process.  We know you’re out there somewhere, and we can’t wait to bring you home.  I started making you a quilt, and you’re in my thoughts every day. I’m knitting you a blanket, and a bunny, and have picked out lots of pretty colors for your nursery.

Last night, drove around looking for a new neighborhood…one where we can have a house to bring you home to, with a room just for you.

And the most exciting thing? Today, Daddy told someone for the first time that we were going to start the journey towards bringing you home to us. 

Right now, we’re praying for you, saving our pennies, and getting all of the paperwork ready. I’m going to start applying for grants, and we’re getting all ready for you…slowly but surely.

Even Maya (your puppy) can’t wait to meet you! :) I think she’s going to love snuggling with you, and I know I am.  I can’t wait to spend mornings singing and playing with you, and kissing your toes and cheeks. You’re so loved, already.  Your Grandma and Grandpa (titles are a work in progress…I think it might end up being Nana and Papa, or maybe even “Aya” which is short for grandparent titles in Amharic.) are going to be so happy to find out about you, and you are going to be so spoiled by all of your aunts and uncles! 

I need to sleep, but I can’t concentrate! (And your Daddy is snoring so loud!)  I can’t wait to cuddle you, and see your smiles.

Love,

Mommy 

We’ve been married for 2 months now, and I couldn’t be happier.

I was so relieved to hear your voice this morning.  

I can’t wait for that “bliss moment” tonight when you walk in after work and I can breathe again.  

My sweet, sweet man…we’re getting married in 22 days!

I can’t wait!

I get it.  My heart has been too consumed in meaningless tasks…in work more than relationships, and money more than community. 

My heart is yours, mold me.  I’m sorry, and I’m surrendering back into your strong and faithful arms.

We’re getting married in.three.months.

I’m crazy-excited, and crazy-overwhelmed, but I trust that God will provide, and I cannot.wait. to be your wifey. :)

Dear B,

It hurts me, when your priority in exercising, is to do cardio to lose weight short term…so that you’ll fit in, and “look” fit, instead of learning your body type, or listening to my experience…and training your body to be AND look fit, long term, so that we can have a happy and long life together.  I don’t care about your weight…except that it’s important to you.  I DO care about your longevity, that you’re here with me to live life abundantly and make every moment count.  That you have no regrets, and don’t look back in twenty years, and wish that you’d been more disciplined in doing the RIGHT kinds of muscle training and working out, so that you would still be reaping those rewards.

I pray for your heart to change, for you to value yourself enough, to know that your heart is what is precious to me.  I think you’re amazingly handsome, and strong, and warm…and I want your strength, warmth, broad shoulders, and soft gentle brown eyes by my side for a very very long time.

Also, it makes me feel guilty when you say things like “you and I have different goals, you don’t care about losing weight.” or, “we owe it to each other to be in the best shape of our lives for our honeymoon” —- I’d much rather be in stellar shape for 50 years of our life together, than crash diet and peak at our honeymoon…then how will we ever live BACK up to that expectation?

“For every contemporary neighbourhood where there is some experience of community and friendship, there’s bound to be another marked more by the values of anonymity and seclusion; and still others where residents actually live in fear of their surrounds.”  - Simon Holt

A metaphor for what The Church has d/evolved into?  The Truth is honestly stark and frightening. What could be a “good experience” for some because they’re getting a small taste of what it would feel like to be part of a more rural/community centered neighbourhood, could alienate others to living in fear and darkness permanently.  

Instead, consider God’s alternative which (due to postmodernism, flesh, and our need for instant gratification) has come full circle from being the only idea, to a “fresh, new” way of thinking about Life-Church vs. Church-Life, and Church being God’s activity in which we participate.  

The Gospel in fact is a most curiously and delicately compounded medicine, and is a medicine that is very easily spoiled.

You may spoil the gospel by substitution. You have only to withdraw from the eyes of the sinner the grand object which the Bible proposes to Faith, — Jesus Christ; and to substitute another object in His place, — the Church, the Ministry … and the mischief is done …

You may spoil the Gospel by addition. You only have to add to Christ, the grand object of faith, some other objects as equally worthy of honour, and the mischief is done …

You may spoil the Gospel by disproportion. You only have to attach an exaggerated importance to the secondary things of Christianity, and a diminished importance to the first things, and the mischief is done. Once alter the proportion of the parts of the truth, and truth soon becomes downright error … 

Don’t worry, it’s just been a “period of adjustment.” You moved. We argued about where you would eat, and how we were going to buy groceries, and how we would mesh our lives.  It’s normal, and it worked. (Only by God’s grace.) And now…

Have I ever been happier in us?  Nope.  And that’s saying a lot, because our beginnings were pretty darned happy.

But this is a different type of positive energy, this is a real, organic, life-together happy. It’s sustainable.  Sustainable joy, grounded in faith…grounded in our time spent praying together, talking together, studying together.  Grounded in our nightly 2-mile walks. Grounded in our commitment to be good stewards of our bodies and resources, and have a healthy breakfast together every morning, even though we’d both rather sleep an extra 30 minutes and eat a bowl of lucky charms and be on our way.

Last night, you plopped down on the couch next to me and started spontaneously serenading me with my favorite, favorite love song.  Yup, you make me melt.  But you know what means even more to me?  You help me wash the dishes, while I make us food.  You call and remind me to eat, and ice my back.  You make it a priority, that I get good sleep so I can face the days ahead. You call me on your way home from work, and those conversations are precious to me. 

This weekend is going to be daunting, to go to our families and announce that we’re (finally) ready to set a wedding date.  Finally ready to begin our life together.  But we continue to share so much, and the Lord is bringing us closer in our convictions.

Well, yes, I did avoid having the conversation with you last night where you were considering going to go back to your old city, to play bass for your old shallow megachurch.  (Yes, I’m brutal, I’m sorry…but you like that about me! Right?)  I cut you off and changed the subject…I want you here with me.  I am trying not to rush you into growth, I know that God is working on your heart, I’ve seen him bring the peace of consensus that only He can bring.  But man is it HARD!  Hard to watch you struggling between what you’ve always known, and what your family accepts, and the glimpses of what you know to be true, the deeper sharing in koinonia, the fellowship with wiser brothers and sisters in Christ. 

We’ll get there, though.  Together.  We’re making it.

Thank you for your hugs last night.  Thank you for being excited with me.

I love you, always.